Welcome to The Flourishing Teacher's Field Guide.

This week, we're tackling a challenge that so many teachers face on a daily basis: setting boundaries without feeling guilty. 

If you've ever found yourself overwhelmed by your teacher workload and wondering why you couldn’t say ‘no’, this one's for you!

Let's jump in...

The Boundary Dilemma: Why Teachers Struggle To Say No

I’m a ‘yes’ person.

Partly because I’m a bit of a people-pleaser and partly because I want others to think I’m indispensable.

Mostly because I like creating opportunities.

The problem was that after years of doing this, I got myself a reputation as a person who would always say yes. 

That meant that my workload slowly went up, and the time I should have spent with my friends and family quickly went down.

Saying yes is pretty normal for teachers.

As dedicated educators, we often prioritize others' needs over our own. We want to help, to go the extra mile for our students, colleagues, and school community. It's what makes us effective teachers.

The result? Severe teacher burnout, resentment, and a work-life balance that was non-existent.

It wasn't until I learned to set boundaries and say no that I rediscovered my passion for teaching and improved my work-life balance. 

And by the way…. 

No one will think any less of you for not taking on the work that someone else should be doing!

Here are the three strategies that made all the difference in reducing teacher stress:

3 Powerful Techniques For Setting Boundaries 

1. The "Positive No" Method: Maintaining Teacher Wellbeing While Preserving Relationships

The 'Positive No' is a game-changer for managing teacher workload and maintaining your wellbeing. It gives you a clear framework for declining requests while affirming your relationships and values. 

Here's how this 3-step response works:

1. Yes (Affirm) - Express appreciation for the request and the faith that the person making the request has placed in you. Recognise the value of the request to the individual or community.

2. No (Decline) - Clearly state your boundary, without apology but with clarity. 

3. Yes (Propose an alternative) - If possible, offer another solution that shows an active interest in the request but minimises your input.

This approach helps maintain positive relationships while protecting your time and energy, crucial for preventing teacher burnout.

2. Values-Based Decision Making: Aligning Choices To Improve Work-Life Balance

When we make decisions based on our core values, saying 'no' becomes easier and less guilt-inducing. 

We just need to be clear on exactly what our core values are.

This method is particularly effective for managing teacher workload:

1. Identify your top 5 professional and personal values (e.g., student growth, work-life balance, continuous learning, authenticity).

2. When faced with a request, ask yourself: "Does this align with my core values?"

3. If it doesn't, it's easier to decline without guilt.

This approach helps reduce the cognitive dissonance that often leads to emotional exhaustion when setting boundaries.

3. The JADE Technique With Self-Care Integration: Combating Teacher Stress

JADE stands for Don't Justify, Argue, Defend, or Explain. It's a powerful tool for maintaining boundaries and preventing teacher burnout. 

It’s my personal go-to process when I’m under pressure to say yes to something else…

1. State your boundary clearly and concisely.

2. If pushed, simply restate your position without elaborating.

3. Follow up with a self-care activity to reinforce your decision.

This technique, combined with immediate self-care, helps reinforce your boundaries and reduce the guilt that often follows saying 'no', ultimately improving your wellbeing.

Remember, setting boundaries isn't selfish – it's necessary for sustainable teaching practice and personal wellbeing. By using these techniques, you're not just saying 'no' to others, you're saying 'yes' to yourself and your long-term effectiveness as an educator.

What Are You Waiting For?

We believe that teachers achieve extraordinary things under challenging circumstances and that we all deserve to be valued, supported and celebrated.

That's what this newsletter is all about.

If you haven't subscribed yet, why not join the Marigold community? You'll get weekly strategies for sustaining your wellbeing, avoiding burnout and flourishing as a person, not just a teacher.

And best of all?

It's free and always will be.

You can find out more about what to expect in this weekly newsletter here, or just go straight to our sign-up form.

Thank You For All You Do

Remember, your worth isn't measured by how many extra tasks you take on, but by the quality of your teaching and the positive impact you have on your students.

By setting healthy boundaries, you're not just taking care of yourself – you're modelling essential life skills for your students and colleagues.

And that’s real teaching, right there.

Here's a quick recap of our top  boundary-setting strategies:

Until next time, remember, you're more than your marking, your lesson observations and your planning.

You're you. And that's all you need to be.